I'm Clueless.. I'm Sorry

Yesterday was awful.. someone hated me so much but i don't have the slighest idea why.. He's one of the friends I've treasured.. but why? The thought of what happened wont leave me alone.. I'm confused.. I panicked.. I would say it'll be okay if I know what I've done... but I don't know... It's too sudden.. So here's something that popped out of my mind~~

 I'm clueless..  

I'm like inside  a room....

with no windows.. 

no door.. 

all white.. 

all blank..

 it's  huge...

 it extends through eternity..

And I don't know where it'll lead me... 

What on earth have  I done? 

But, never worry.. 

I won't hate you like you did.. 

I'll give you space.. 

I'll give you time.. 

to think..

to breathe.. 

but please, whenever you're ready.. 

let me listen.. 

let me understand.. 

and let me hug you once again.. 

and be my friend 'til the end..

>.< geez~~ i can't seem to compose myself... whenever I'm alone, the thought of it comes back~~ what on earth have I done... TT_TT


Dear K-kun,


Thank you for the time you've spent with me... All those times I've been real.. The person you've opened up to, that was the real me.. I am annoying, I know.. but I'm glad you had the patience to talk to me. I've always treasured everything. I know a friend when I meet one, and you're one of those friends that I've learned to care for.. to worry about.. Thank you for everything you've shared to me. It's as if I've invaded your private life and yet you still welcomed me. I always feel special and really happy every time a person who I just met.. in real life or even just virtually become this close to me... But yesterday happened.. I don't know.. T_T I don't know exactly how and what to feel.. Whatever it is I've done, which I don't have the slightest idea of, I'm sorry.. I still want to save our friendship.. I really do.. I hate losing friends.. It's like I'm left alone.. It hurts to think that maybe you just grew tired of being friends with me.. But it's your decision.. and I have to accept it.. Although I'm hoping to stay friends with you, your decision will prevail.. It's your life.. I'm just glad that for once in my life, I've got to know you.. Thank you so much for everything. I won't say goodbye, coz I hate that word... Instead, I'll tell you this.... I'll wait for you to come back..


From,
S




PS: i hope you can read this... and sorry for making this.. i just don't have any other idea on what to do..

Happy Birthday to the World's BEST Dad: My Papa (^_^)

Hmmnnn~~ how do I start off with this entry???
*thinks... thinks... thinks*

~~There'll be NO OTHER GUY in this WORLD that I WANT my FATHER to be~~

     ~~~~It SHOULD BE YOU... IKAW RA PA.... NO OTHER....~~~~

      ~!~I LOVE YOU Papa... and A very HAPPY BIRTHDAY to you~!~

I couldn't ask for more~~ IKAW NA PA!!

I really hope that you'll enjoy your birthday.. with US (me and mama) of course :)

I wish you GOOD HEALTH.. LONG LIFE... and MORE BIRTHDAYS to come...

May PAPA GOD shower us with MORE BLESSINGS~~ :)

I always love to hear Mama Nor saying these words...

"KUNG MAG-ASAWA NA GY KA NAK, PANGITA JUD OG PAREHA NI PAPA NIMO."

and I TOTALLY agree with her... You're the BEST husband any woman would dream of having... No wonder why amidst EVERTHING that you and mama had gone through, your LOVE for each other remained strong~~ burning everyday :)

But I wonder if GUYS like Papa still exist~~~ :)

If you're Mama's BEST MAN... DILI pud ko PALUPIG~!!! (^_^)

...You're the BEST FATHER...

and I'm so lucky to be your daughter!!

Papa, I owe you a lot.. You've sacrificed a lot for me... for mama.. for our family.. and I can never thank you enough for it. I'm just so lucky~!! I really thank Papa GOD for making me part of you and mama's life. You're the best pa... Sorry if maldita kaayo ko usahay :) *permi diay* hehe~~ Sorry for being an imperfect daughter.. yet you accepted me as me... Sorry kung, there are times na mutubag ko.. or whatever na part sa akong batasan ang wala nimu mauyuni.. hahaha :) BUT you're still there~~ willing to support me all the way... Papa, You've sacrificed enough.. THIS TIME, ako napud... :)

Last nalang jud ni nga hunat pa~~~ after this, I'll take over :) We can do this pa ^_^ Me, You and Mama has survived all these years~~~ gamay na lang jud :) agwanta lang sa ta gamay :) We'll get this through ^_^

PROMISE na nako ninyo ni mama :)

waaaaaa~~~ DRAMA na kaayo ko dah :)

dili bagay~~ maguba akong CUTE IMAGE :) hehehehe ^^,

I LOVE YOU PA~!!!!

STAY HANDSOME~!!!!

hehehehehe (^_^)v

once again~~~

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAPA JHUN~!!!

My Blog: My Diary

Lately, I've been making this blog as my own diary~
why not?  the title per se explains everything :) deshou??
TegoShei no Sekai: it's my world..


Hmmnn.. Today, I started reading "school-related stuffs" in preparation for the upcoming board examination this December... Hayai desu ne?? But, I have my goal~~ and I've been longing to achieve that... (^_^)

Earlier this evening, an announcement was made which ignited the sleeping fire of my fan girl side~~
although it's somehow a bit frustrating since the full announcement would still be on Tuesday next week, I'm quite positive about it... and I can't stop myself from spazzing and hoping...

PLEASE~~~ at least give 4nin NEWS a project to work on together... a new single perhaps???
but I'm longing for them to have an album~~ then a concert!!! nyay~!!! that would be great~!!! :D
However, for now, we still have to wait for next week~~~ waaa 6 days seem to be 6 long years~~ fuuuu :(((

~~~and fuuuuu.. another thing... (in relation to my previous blog post)

I'm talking with him now... well, I'm just so happy that we're still doing what we usually do despite the fact that he made me confess to him... haha :) sometimes, it pays to be honest~~~ we both are.. REALLY!

He said sorry~~~ perhaps he felt bad?? but he doesn't have to be... :) I knew from the start that there wasn't even the slightest chance for us to be together... :) He has always been honest for what he is~~ afterall, i presume it's my fault.. solely my fault for falling in love with him :)

But hey~!! I don't feel any regret... After answering him when he asked me regarding my feelings for him... i felt way better than I used to. . . we can now act as naturally as possible :) Now, isn't it a nice thing?? hehe

Ohh well~~~ I guess I've talked to much..

//end.of.entry//

WHY?

You are arrogant~~~
you keep on teasing me...
you keep on calling me baka little girl~~

But WHY?
WHY do I still like you this much?

Why do you have such an impact on me?
Why are you capable of sweeping me off of my feet?
Tell me.. why?? why??

You're making me lose myself!!!
You're so stupid~~~ i hate you...!!!
for making me feel this way~~

You boldly asked me NOT to fall in love with you...
But HELL~!!! You're doing EVERYTHING that makes my heart forget how to beat normally~!

In a while~~ you'll make me feel unwanted~
rejected...~ lonely.... full of anger~~

but in an instant~!!!

YOU erased those unwanted feelings and changed it with laughter~~
with pleasant feelings that i could barely remember the meaning of sadness~~

Damn it~!!! WHY?????

A simple rant. . .

*sigh*

what an awful way to start a blog post.. deshou?
demo ne~~ i really couldn't understand!!!
why do i like him? hahaha... (akala niyo kung ano noh?)
but~~~~~ it's quite hard, you know?!

sometimes i wonder if i'm even normal~~
am i?? or am i not??~ what do u think?? o.O

there are a lot of things i couldn't decipher~!!
things about life~... love~.. and the like... XD

kodomo??? tabun neh? ^^
afterall.. i'm just a stupid little girl~~~

//end.of.story//

Happy Birthday Mama :)

Today is one of the most special days. It’s the natal day of the most loving… most caring… BEST MOTHER this world could ever have (oh yes! I’m biased) .. It’s my mother’s birthday ^^ Yeys~!!! J Uhmmnn.. I don’t exactly know what to give her so I decided to make a short video for her… J

Dear Mama Nor,

          Happy happy happy birthday~! Have a blast! It’s your day~!! Ma, words aren’t enough to show and tell you how happy I am to have a mother like you. I feel so blest! These feelings of happiness and gratitude are overflowing. I can’t ask for more. Really~!!

          You’re not only my mother… and you know that! You are my best friend.. and I’m damn proud about it. I feel so overwhelmed every time my friends tell me how they wanted to have a mother like you… a mother who understands, a mother who supports like no other… I can never be as open to anyone else aside from you ma… You know me more than anyone else in this world, and am proud for that. I mean, it’s seldom having your mom as your best buddy, your partner in crime, your fellow crazy fangirl, right?

          I love you ma and may you have many more birthdays to come.. You’re the sweetest gift a family could have. We’re indeed lucky to have you in our lives… You’re the best wife, the best mother, the best sister and the best friend this world can offer… I love you ma, and may God bless you with bountiful blessings.

                                                                                                          Love Lots,

                                                                                                              Mae  ^_^